Audemars Piguet Royal Oak ref. 5402 ‘jumbo’ in yellow gold with champagne dial
I’ve been obsessed with this watch for years. I’m not exaggerating.

It’s been my iPhone lock screen since 2013 and has survived two phone upgrades. Get me started and I literally cannot shut up about how much I love this watch.

Our editorial director Wei Koh has the version in yellow gold with an anthracite dial, an incredibly attractive watch, but for me it’s all about the champagne dial.

It’s this version that—as kids say nowadays—makes me thirst (many waters cannot quench it; neither can the floods drown it). There’s just something about how this watch perfectly balances opposing forces.

Slim in stature, yet commanding in presence. Angular silhouette but round dial. Straightforward functions, unusual beat rate (love this movement, by the way).

Power and geometry. An all-gold interpretation of the first steel watch to cost more than a gold watch. I don’t usually desire watches that I can’t wear (it’s far too large on my wrist despite its stated 39mm diameter, due to how the bracelet is attached), but you know, there are exceptions to every rule.

De Bethune DB25 S Jewellery
Anyone who knows me in the slightest will be familiar with my pathological aversion to the color blue. I suspect it has something to do with my being forced daily to wear a blue school uniform in my formative years, but who really knows?

So when I come across a blue watch that I like, you’d better believe it’s one hell of a watch. The De Bethune DB25 S Jewellery beat out a whole bunch of other watches that I love from this brand—including the DB25 Midnight Blue, the DB25 White Night, the DB27 Titan Hawk Rose (this one put up a tough fight), the DB28 Digitale and the DB28 Maxichrono—to take this spot, despite being the bluest out of all of them and despite being set with diamonds and sapphires.

(Newsflash: I’m not crazy about gem-set watches either. I don’t dislike them; I just don’t really see what the big deal is, most of the time). This is a watch that is so beautiful, it makes me drop all pretenses of rationality and principled behavior.

I can’t explain it and maybe I don’t want to.

Patek Philippe Ref. 5950
I’m having a real problem here—I can’t decide on the final watch I want. This sentiment would probably get me lynched out in the real world, but, I mean, if there’s one time that such monstrous levels of self-indulgence can be forgiven, it’s got to be during the compilation of a hypothetical Christmas wishlist.

So essentially, the watch I’m thinking of already exists, but not in its complete form. Confused? I’m referring to the Patek Philippe split-seconds chronograph ref. 5950.

We first saw it in 2010 in a steel case, white dial, leather strap (yes, no, yes). In 2014, they brought it out in a steel case, salmon sunburst dial, bracelet (yes, yes, no).

This year, it’s back in a rose-gold case, salmon satin-finished dial, leather strap (no, yes, yes). You see where I’m going with this?

The most straightforward solution to this, I suppose, would be to get an extra leather strap to go with the 2014 model.

You hear that, Santa? Make sure you write that down, now. You know, I’ve been really good this year (please don’t check, though).